"Easy"

Hello folks - the picture above is one of those things that I have been working on in my time after I jump out of my car from my commute. I am going to really work on taking more pictures and sharing more. It's has to be said that my thoughts and actions don't always translate into action. I am working on this...it's cost me a lot on the past- Memories, interesting relationships, and opportunites (I am sure)~ Yesterday while reading a new british magazine at the coffee shop I read an article about worry and how counterproductive it is. I have been really getting pretty good about being verbal, letting things and issues go and moving on. I am sitting here listening to internet radio and taking a short break. I just put a chai banana bread in the oven. The funny thing is that I have found that I have spent a lot of time obsessing and thinking of things that really are important but dont deserve or NEED obsessing about. By not obsessing about weight I managed to lose about 4 lbs last week. Eating sensible, moving more and drinking water ( making an effort for sure on the last item). The flowers are in my front lower flower bed. There are 2 one is elevated and one is ground level. The upper level is filled with coral petunias and they are pretty. My front sitting area has some fire engine red chairs that are making life easy and enjoyable as I watch the cars go by. The flowers are spreading, filling in blooming and moving forward. I am love how I put them down and God just does soo much work for my enjoyment. The front is now a good coffee and paper reading place, I have tested it out! God knows how to speak to me and tell me to slow down, speed this up and turn here. Working feverishly on not missing on bit of HIS directive... Tommorrow is Memorial Day. I have a lot of military men in my family. A LOT - some retired some have moved to the other side of life.. but they served. I've not forgotten what this day represents....and I hope while you eat, drink and rest you remember as well. And don't forget to smell your flowers too!

Maybe God is tryin to tell "ME" sumthin

I guess the eyeglasses are symbolizing "insight" okay... it's 7:51PM my time... and I have been home from work for several hours... I mean like several. I got of the interstate, went to the lawn and garden store, bought some stakes and ( just a few more plants) and then... changed clothes. grey yoga pants ( heck I was doing a form of yoga I think) and my long sleeve t-shirt that has duel purpose. It's a reminder of a goal I accomplished long ago and it reminds me that mosquitos like my blood - so protection is in order.

A few weekends ago I took the opportunity to walk and reflect in my favorite garden center it's like a mental oasis for me and talk about calming -it's a natural "relaxer"... when I drive up on the lot I get happy. No exaggeration here. I went there to get my favorite garden incense - this sounds extravagant but it's the best mosquito repellant ( which is it's purpose) that I have found, and I dont have to put it on me to be protected.

This evening I lit a stick ( which takes about 1+ hours to burn down , and got to work. I planted lemon and apple mint in 2 hanging baskets- up on the shepherds hook they went!
In the ground went 3 lambs ears plants. ( they prevent aphids from attacking the garden) but the main reason I got them was because I love to feel rub the leaves between my fingers so nice ( they feel like puppy and kitten ears- as for the name I have NEVER rubbed a lambs ear soo I better not say it feels just like....)
Then 4 cabbage plants, 3 sugar snap pea and 3 green bean plants later. I thought I was finished.... but then I started doing some "weeding"... and then I planted a begonia and watered everything ( though rain is threatening- afterall the weatherman is just "a mere mortal"!)

My title is based on the fact that I made quite a number of friends on you tube...but I stopped making videos right before a lot of things changed in my life which forced a change in my vantage point. I decided this evening that maybe I'd start back making vids again.. but I got on and tried to play some vids not working- found out they'd reformatted everything ( not interested in figuring it out) and decided thatI would call it quits. I am going to disable comments on all the vids and notify my "friends" and move on... I took it as God trying to tell me something - ther is more to life - ( not that, that was all I did far from it) but there is definitely some more for me to do... and my folks that I know I will keep in contact with them... as we already do....

I got the message loud and clear. :)
Toodles~

Perinneals vs. Annuals~ I now know what I am.

So I just finished doing my after work walk through in my garden. I have stated the order of my day, when I get home I go outside do a walk through - water and then stand there and get bitten by mosquito's ( new development) and then come in relaxed / decompressed. I got today's title because there are a lot of things going on in my life right now. I have had to pray this week for my nanny as she was having an issue which "appeared" to be a big deal. God is gracious and she is fine... I have had to bat down some feelings about some other things going on in life that just kinda make for an interesting soup but I know that HE can handle those as things as well. 2 lessons I have learned this year soo far ( the deep kind worth mentioning here - but they are all worth paying heed to). 1)Things work out no matter how it appears. 2)Treat each day and each experience with the respect it deserves~ An interested thing happened today with at my new workplace....a meeting was called with my manager and the manager's manager. I sighed and wondered... is all well? inmy mind I thought "things are going good " right? I never felt trepidation but I can't always trust the feelings casue they can fool you. When I left my last place I wondered about folks motives. I experienced first hand that all folks really want is "what they want", when they want it. Scary revelation. I went to my meeting, unsure of what to think. No feelings of trepedation - just all around uncertainty. I decided during my hiatus, I can do what can, I will do the best I can each time I do anything. It was all good, I left out of the meeting feeling valued and with an financial increase after 4 months at my job. I felt appreciated and I knew for sure that God's hands were all in it. Recognition came twice today in my private meeting and among my peers. I am blessed. Working unto God just doesn't hurt, ever. I am never far from thinking about creative stuff, right now it happens to be my garden and one of other personal projects. My gardens both flower and vegetable/herb. I have always wanted to grow stuff and to share it. I will tell you this. Each year we are told there are plants that come back every year Perrenials (sp). The other genre are annuals. Those you buy and they grow this season at frost you pluck them up after the frost kills them. Not so! I have proof, last year I planted vinca's in the ground. 2 have come back and they now have woody stems ( will it make a bush?)and are about to flower. Same with another flowering plant. If that were not enough I have Oregano from last year ( gone wild) and 2 chard plants ( from last year)which have produced 2 loads of chard this month alone. Now I notice the cucumbers planted last year have made a comeback on their own! All of these beds were cleaned and plucked except the oregano ( it was my personal experiment~ .. these are all plants that we are led to believe only last one season. I know better now. I decided with my good outcome today that I too am a perinneal. I have a growing season , it might appear that I was down and possibly out- but since the conditions are right. I am sprouting and bearing fruit/purpose. I am thankful to be able to experience this lesson. I am thankful that my season and my relevance is not over ~ Toodles.

HURRY UP AND SLOW DOWN~

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Hello all~ I don't really know who "all" is anymore...it's been another hiatus. I think it was a time for reflection- active reflection cause I am not sure we get to sit down and reflect on anything anymore. I feel forced to multi-task even though I am "no longer a fan". Some things just have their place and it does just not soo much, not right now. I have spent a lot of time hurriedly -hurrying. I could blame my husband for some of it... because I clearly was not in an anticipatory state all the time - or having to "stay ready" for this or that all the time prior to marriage... but I think we temper ourselves and we adjust and everything...I am in no means complaining about the fella or the institution of marriage. What I am doing here today is telling it as I see it and how I feel unfiltered and uncut. On the way home... I called home and asked the fella to chop up some veggies (*onions and bell peppers to be exact). Well It just was not going to happen for me.. Monday's are either the crockpot day or the fella is supposed to cook. The crockpot was not going... so... deduction is I got the stuff - you know what to do... that is what I MEANT by the statement - "it just was not to happen for me". I remember this scenario- my mom would tell us to do something - we'd calculate the time wrong and right when she'd be close enough to home that we'd not possibly be able to complete the task - we'd go into overdrive. 1 or 2 things would happen - I would get the exhilaration from pulling off the great task in record time... or I'd go into explain mode ( which always precluded a whipping). My husband stole something from my childhood playbook...as I stole a move from someone else's playbook ( my granny by another mother). She told me a while ago- to slow down , enjoy life and don't get strung out or up by things that just aren't that important. She told me this at a time when the fella were not in a good space. My pitch it all and start again thinking was surfacing... ( I reserve the right to scrap a plan in a minute- be it right or be it wrong). This evening after I got out of the car from my 45 minute commute;which I have finally calmed down and learned to kinda enjoy after 4 months. I got out of the car hopeful,I came in the house and realized that I needed to cut up onions and the peppers, cause the time was not calculated right. God is gracious tome. I put the entree together in record time! Then I made a decision... I would go outside after I got out of my work clothes and water my garden... just turn on the spigot and water away~ It felt good to get out there, to be doing something that was going to benefit in the future and was a benefit right now!Water w/ the hose felt like a treat; heck it was a non-caloric treat. I got stuff growing I'm already sharing from my garden with some of my friends at work - oregano filled houses chard enhanced dinners ... from my wee- "farm" This is the stuff life is made of - it's the God winks that we miss when we move soo fast that most things become a blur...I think I am enjoying slowing down... but I have got to tell you... I am by no means coming to a grinding halt... just changing gears. If my sister from another mother is reading this - ( and you "sho know who you are" I want to tell you - Thank you for the written letter you "sho hoped me"- as the old folks say) and I love you for knowing what to do, and when to do it... and then doing it... ( the next play book move, i'll be stealing)... I'm just sayin'. Toodles~

ALL or NOTHING! really? ~

Today is a good day for a revelation. The revelation made me smile on my insides. For most of my life I have been controlled by my thoughts of perfection. Everything was black or white no room for grey ( even though it's a valid color/concept and has it's place in life and society LOL). I had the baby and the bathwater syndrome. Very good at completing task, but always feeling "failuresque" if it could not be done "just right". I realize that I just made up a word in the previous sentence, bear with me.

I am doing laundry and several other things at once my new version of multitasking but on a different tip. I know that what I am doing does not require perfection - but it does require completion. What caused me to put up this post is that I have been exercising but it's not been like it used to be. I am finding I am not regimented, or self condescending for not doing everything perfect. As of late my times have varied but I noticed increased willingness to tell me that "some is better than none". This is ALL NEW in the response arena for me!

The issue::Just a few minutes ago I was looking at a magazine.I learned last year to pull out what I need and discard the rest. This magazine was going through demolition. Secretly I was wondering what made me buy it initially. I found 2 salvagable pages with 3 recipes. One of the recipes I would like to alter and make tonight as a side-dish. I looked at it to see what I'd need. Some of the ingredients can be costly and not something I will use regularly, I am soo not into waste. I decided that I would not make the recipe because I did not want to buy 3 of the ingredients and have them sitting around only to go "bad". Note to self "you will still have to cook dinner".I realized I was missing an op to try something different and new. My all or nothing had reared its ugly head somewhere else. I am finding that some thought patterns are pervasive - they have literally infiltrated every area of our being. I want to root this one out, I've missed out on being more "merry" because of it.

The solution:: I am going to one of my local ethnic stores as these type ingredients may be cheaper there. If they are not I am going bin shopping at the speciality market and only "get what I need" to make one serving of the dish. I decided that I want to try this dish and not "wonder" if it's good. I want to KNOW.

It's simple math to one other person and a conundrum for another. I think I just found the answer to this math problem. Nothing from nothing does indeed leave nothin, but a little bit of this and a little bit of that may produce a WHOLE LOT of merry in my world. I am all for increased "merry",I need to lighten up...

Toodles~

"My how the time fiies"...

Today's title is pretty much how I felt today. I have said on my vlog that I use a towel over the console of the treadmill when I am walking so I wont be fixated on it. Today was no different. I knew how long I was going to walk I just did not know what my outcome for my other numbers were going to be.

Anymore I have a goal for my workouts, this is different as my goal used to be to do it until I get too tired to continue. Now tired is a known part of the equation so my goal now is to reach "specifics". Today my goal was to have a 300cal workout. I wanted to offset my after workout power drink. I kinda knew what I'd be adding to it. ( all good stuff - spinach, frozen banana, 1/2C mango puree and the protein powder of course).

I noticed when I started exercising consistently in late summer I was staring at the treadmill console clock and anything else that told time- my watch, the wall clock- the clock on the television - you get the idea. It seemed like 30mins took forever. Now 30 min comes pretty quick. Time hasn't sped up but my attitude toward time when I workout has changed drastically. Time is no longer the "headliner" - my calorie burn and the length of my walks have taken the starring role. My calorie burn is coming from the use of one button - the incline. I love it....

I wanted to stop by and document one my best workouts ever- my goal is to beat one of the workout tapes I have that promises a 500 calorie burn in an hour. I think sometime next week I just might do it... and when I do- you all will know it!
Toodles~
*the pix is the console on my treadmill - 6% incline, 411 calories burned, 56 minutes, and 2.62 miles.* Thank you Jesus.

Write the Vision?

Ya'll it's countdown time... you know to what I won't even go there today. Yesterday what was impressed on me so strongly was a question I was asked during my recent interview. This is the scene: 2 women sitting there rapid firing questions at me. Not really a big deal,this was not the first time this had happened. The thing that I am making a big deal about today isn't new either. The question was,"where do you plan to be in the next 5 yrs?", I answered.

All over you-tube and in magazines - vision boards are mentioned. I have a modified thingee ( it's on my refrigerator so you know it's not big). I put this up there for things that I wanted for this house. It's a couple years old. I realized about 9months ago that the things on the board had been fufilled and I was able to mark everything off. It was soo smooth some of it I did not even realize my desires had been given to me. I also was upset with myself for not paying closer attention to my "list". We've had repairmen here in the kitchen, and guest here in the kitchen.I don't know if anyone knew what my list was, but I knew it was there. I wondered what would have happeded had I revisited it more often if I had paid closer attention to it. I bet things would have happened faster and my praise would have been more consistent.

I listened to a webcast this morning I had NO idea of the content but again God was leading/guiding his special kid ( that's me). When I seek him to "break it down" in elemetary terms to me He's faithful to do just that! This guest minister I have heard before and I love to hear him teach. I promise you I learned a long time ago- to listen to/look at the substance coming out of the container and not the container itself. It's only fair, I am repeatedly asking for the same courtesy.

I decided to refresh my miniature vision list. It's time. I want to have some new memorials and things to celebrate and look back on. I want some new things to be able to say "remember when God did such and such?" This is the stuff that makes me smile and gives me hope. While I am asking Him for stuff, I definitely plan on doing my best to stay on top of the things He's asked me to do as well!
http://vimeo.com/31511057

I am gonna get this done today- Believe that.

Toodles~

All laid back.

Today has been a good day for me. I am leaning more toward keeping my blog going and doin my vlog for the purpose it serves. I understand that there is something about my personality that is quirky, even funny. I don't know what it is... it just is. But I will say this... there is a serious side to me. If I am talking about something incessantly or thinking about something constantly ( noone will know that unless I get to talking about it) then it's something that needs my attention or that I happen to be giving a lot of attention. Right now my health is at the top of the list, a close second is my return to work ( a new job) and getting some of these " new life" plans into action. I love a plan but I get excited to when it's time to put it into action and I get to see if it really works or needs tweakin'.
Since July ( the tail end of it) I have really amped up the importance of exercise and improving my eating. I realized that not eating well and my habit of "not eating period" was not a good combo. My body was confused and it just held on to everything-I was not exercising at all. A sedentary job and which was highly stressful just made up the perfect storm.
It's been decided that 2012 and beyond is going to be happy and good time in my life. I want to know what I've envisioned will work. I am standing my ground and my laid back attitude kind of surfaced today... I have been waiting on that part of me to show up... the laid back self - I have not seen her in about 7 years..
I got a feeling I am going to like my laid back self. :)
Toodles~

So, Sew, Sow....

This morning I feel soo much better. I am about to workout in a bit but I have already done some work this morning. I took out the trash(modified weight lifting) and then I performed the Saturday morning ritual of changing the sheets; which is an activity that I have kept from childhood. I have one load of clothing that is in the dryer and one last load to wash. I will then be finito with the laundry. I have reached and lifted and swept and all those things this morning. I guess to some folks this is a "so" what? To me it's a signal that I feel good. My routines old and new are taking form and I am happy about this. I love a good plan- especially the kind that seem to be "doable". I failed to mention that I made our menu up through Tuesday ( this is normal) and wrote it on the erasable menu board in the kitchen. This is my secret effort to stave off having to answer the "what's for dinner?" question - sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't.

Yesterday my plan was to complete one of the sewing projects that I mentioned on my vlog. I got it pinned on... which sometimes is the part that gets on my nerves. I got amped yesterday because there are soo few pieces that I did not realize it! The problem ? I was soo energy depleted from my "nose war" that I could not sew. I had to concede and go and lay down. I coughed and hacked. I held up the white flag - which was actually a fresh tissue to blow my nose. My nose won that battle - I plan to sew today.

Now I am excited about going to church tomorrow. Don't ask me why... I have the same excitement about it that I felt when it got close to the New Year ... I am excited about life in general- but this year for some reason I have been REALLY EXCITED. I am excited I know for sure for all the possibilities. I am a giver and going back to work is going to allow me to sow into the lives of others the way I want to. I have been kinda slacking in this area in 2011 and I hated it. I do it because I am supposed to, I do it because nowadays folks don't love on each other as we should. I do it because it's an inherited trait ( Thanks Mom). I do it because it allows my hands to be free to do it again and again. The selfish part of giving for me is it makes me feel good.
So today is a for real a So, Sew, Sow day.
"Make God's will the focus of your life day by day. If you seek to please Him and Him alone, you'll find yourself satisfied with life". - Kay Arthur
Toodles ~

Fitness is a state of Body AND a state of mind!

Today I am just a bit frustrated regarding getting my workout in. I am doing everything I can to "shazach" myself into feelin' like myself and getting better all around. Stuffy nose, red nose, scabbed nose. Sputtering when I talk,( due to running out of breath) and the nasal sound of hoarseness just is not cute. I am not concerned about the cute part. I want to feel like working out.
The thoughts I am having now are sooo different for me. I almost don't know what to do with the thoughts I have about working out and my eating plan. I am going to work in a week, and I feel like these symptoms have cut into my plot to workout, and to do the other things I feel like I need to do...( the truth is-I was not able to workout ONE day) all this because I was not able to work out yesterday. I did not have the power to do it AND breathe well. Today I am going to workout no matter what -I will do a modified workout (tape or something).
I finally found a meal replacement bar that I can make for work. I have my workout clothes on alert. I got my crockpot ( for dinners that can start while I am on my way home). I am working myself through my wardrobe and finding all kinds of stuff. The issue is that I have been working from home and now I am factoring a "commute" and other things... I am excited and a moving forward with the normal trepidation that anyone in my position would feel.
I ate well yesterday even though I didn't feel good. I still did not feel like me though. I know that I am doing better today... but I want to get back to feeling like myself. The truth is my old self is dwindling away and a new improved me is emerging.I like her... but SHE is different...
On second thought -Maybe it is normal to want to exercise daily and to get frustrated when you can't. - maybe it is normal to know that you ate well but could have done better and start thinking about self improvement. - Maybe it is normal to be excited about planning for well being instead of waiting for the gauntlet to drop ( the correct word is proactive). Maybe it's normal to want to be Better!
Toodles~
"Health is not valued until sickness comes". - Thomas Fuller

Growing while I lose!

Today...I am in a very Happy mode. I looked through my old exercise book. The one I started after the most recent "false start" a couple of years ago. It still had some relevance. There were some things in there that I know I won't be going back to, I will be -adding to the book and taking away!

This book is filled with recipes, reminders and info in general. I was talking to someone the other day, and it just dawned on me. I have lived a life cloaked and shrouded in secrecy on some level. There is a difference between private situations and secrecy. I won't get on the web and blast my SSN or where I live or anything like that...but I finally figured out my purpose... can I say it right now? No... but I have been doing it for some time. I just did not know it...Now I do.

I now know that my basic core person is enough to do everything that God intended for me to do on this side of the dirt. That He has been building my life brick by brick; even when I was doing the stuff that was mundane (or so I thought) or hurtful, or uncomfortable. Right now.. all that stuff has helped me to learn to grow and to be more free in my skin than I have ever been. I regret only that it's taken me soo long. Truth be told, though I could not have handled any of this before now because I was not ready.

Change is good. Being accountable is good. Sharin' is "underated". I used to think that telling what I know or have learned would be a negative... but I am finding out that there is always someone that is willing to learn or needs some of the most basic information I have. I have learned soo much from other folks my whole life...
I have learned from homeless folks that no one likes to be alone and everyone needs a friend or someone/something to care about and to know that someone cares about them . My sister goes to feed the homeless every week she looks for them and they look for her too.There's an even exchange there - though to the "unlearned eye" it looks one-sided.
I learned that I can mother w/o being a mother - NOBODY could have told me that 20 years ago. All I knew is that no one would want me because of my "lot" and no way would I ever be fufilled. Not true...
I have learned from my brother that some hurts never go away fully - but they get bearable. We all did good this Dec. 23rd; I did not have a meltdown or do hardly any "I wishes" though the memories of the loss are ever present... We all did well it's taken 7yrs to get here.
I have maintained the mindset from my Nanny that "flexibility" is important. She could figure out how to fix, rig, or work around most things if given a minute. At this time she has Alzheimers so her "figurer-outer" is not working soo well, but even now she is able to express some happy,pain, and from time to time will sing her version of a song. We take whatever we get from her.
I am still learning daily and I am now certain it never ends. My eating plan and exercise is pretty doggone good at this point. And I lost a total of 7 lbs this week.
I am doing just fine- and still better than Ok!
Toodles~

PLANNING MODE CONTINUES!

Okay so here I go, here I go, here I go... today I decided to put up the picture of the zuchhinni cakes ( think crab w/o the crab) because I decided this is going to be my lunch! I really don't know how they are going to manifest if I don't get outta here and get the zuchinni to make them though. This means going to the market.
I have been planning for returning to work-making decisions that I have not had to make in quite sometime. One of the advantages of working from home was - well, working from home ( please believe me there are disadvantages that equal or eclipse the advantages). Get up do a load of laundry- start dinner, vacuum etc. Now I am remembering I have to plan exercise, lunch, dinner for the dude and such. I in turn get to leave work at work now. Have a real stop and start time for work,interact with folks (not remotely)and see body language,no evenings /no weekends!

I know better than to rely on the fella to cook.So no delusional thinking here,it can happen but I will take those days when the come but I won't rely on them being consistent.
Q?:What am I going to do?
A!:I have a crockpot (C-pot) that was a high-school graduation present (no lie). It's the only one that I own I have been out of high school 30yrs. I found a recipe today that is a soup that requires 6 hours of cooking and it will overcook if I start it in the am. If I want "mush" I will intentionally make mush; overcooked soup is mush to me. I need a C-pot with a timer on it! I think I am due an upgrade.
Did I mention I am in planning mode? LOL. I know how to make a rotisserie style chicken ( like the kind in W-mart) in the crockpot... so the possibilities are endless. Planning is selfish- I am really doing it to ensure that my stress level stays "way down"... like it is now.
I am sure I will find all kinds recipes.
OOh I almost forgot. I am down another pound so that's 4lbs for day 3 of my tweaked eating path... I am doing just fine- and better than ok.
Toodles~

POSSIBILITES ~

Sometimes I feel like I am an undercover agent of sorts. I wonder... do folks really know me?, are they interested in knowing the real me? or if they even care?... I got on this thread of thinking because I have had some folks that don't know me very well or at all RECENTLY respond to my nuances/personality.Some things even people I am related or long term friend w/ have never addressed or mentioned. Case in point- the head hunter I have been working with ( which was a happenstance more than an intentional move- details at 11) stated last week- "you are just a little to easy to get along with- what's up with that?". I have been volleying back and forth with this fella for approximately 1.2 months and for him to blurt that out was a little different. I was momentarily shocked but at the same time I had to take into account he does not know I am new and improving.
What he was hearing was actually appropriateness for the situation. There was a time when he would have been correct. Easy going, door mattish, too laid-back ( almost reclining) described me. A lot of taking it on the chin in public , crying later and killing myself softly- w/ food.
I explained to him that I was easy to get along with in this particular setting because there was no reason for me to respond any other way. My questions, were being answered, he was working on my behalf, and I had some prospects for work... He then understood a bit better. I did talk to him and explain where I am on a professional level and now I need/want covering of a big established company, benefits, TIME and consistency.Those are the things that are of importance to me,"aaah" was his response.
I was informed today that my offer package is in the works. The company wants to make sure that I am interested. I informed them "yes". I can relax now and expect a call next week.
I am on day 2 of my tweaked eating plan. I am down 3lbs since yesterday. Was I deprived - no! Is this fitting w/ my habits ( yea-yah) and I finally feel like I am on the total right path for me. FINALLY!
My exercise is funny. I have never envisioned myself being a 6hr /day exercise type person. I aint on the BL Ranch and I dont have the time. I am about effecient training for conditioning and health ( those are most likely synonymous). I am finding I can push harder and still keep my workouts at less than an hour and come out on top!
I am in a good space today. I have been making a concious effort to enjoy the remainder of my life. To not let folks "rain on my parade", "drag me down", "pee in my coffee" or make me feel like anything less than what God has already bellowed in the world's ear that I am.
I got shalom today ya'll...( everything's not perfect- but life ain't broken and nothing is missing..)
Toodles.

What to do?

This Morning I am up and at 'em finally. I vlog but I am finding that writing here helps me even more than the vloggin. My vlogging is more about the physical aspect of my path to wellness/health and the emotional part as well. Over here... well it's all the rest of the components of me.
I got up this morning with soo many thoughts in my head. Things I want to do today, the problem is- I think I will need some extra hours to get all of the things I "want to do" done.
Some of the tasks are really things that are functional - such as I need to get a frame I have my coupon and I am ready, I measured the frame so I know I have the right size in mind- this time I will write it down though because the last time I went to the store "in search" I got special...
I want to sew. I am looking over my wardrobe and preparing for the call about my new gig. I arrived early at the last interview so that I could see how the women/men who entered were dressed. It helps that some of the stores that I shop at now are a lunchbreak away. My plan is that as my size decreases that I will sew more. I enjoy the satisfaction and the relaxing feeling that sewing gives me. At the end the feeling of accomplishment of creating a "one of a kind" creation also provides inertia for the next project.
I mentioned tweaking my eating program and I am looking for 2 books - (so a trip to the bookstore is in order) the books may provide me some insight and help me narrow down my tweak. I am not sure I will make a purchase of either unless there is a concept that I just can't grasp or there's info that I will need to reference again!
I know to some this sounds like work- but to me this is a relaxing day.
Ohh and while I am at I am definitely going to grab a coffee!
I hope you are going to have a good relaxing day as well.
Toodles~

2012 Solutions

Several years ago I stopped "resolving" things... this also meant no longer would I make new year resolutions. What precipitated this new thinkin? I experienced a situaiton that was SUPPOSED to "resolve" an issue once and for all I did the background work all the footwork ( so I thought) I am still today dealing with the backlash from that decision as the claims had some verity but it was not at all the resolution I understood or expected. I morphed over to "solutions for the new year" at that time.
I always start my solutions in advance of the NEW year...I started this year in August. Tweaking my eating habits, tweaking my exercise habits and taking better care of me from all aspects. My work life balance had been out of whack for a really long time. It was the last major thing that I dealt with.
Making snap decisions w/o consulting God is not an option. It became apparently clear that work had taken over- there was no down time, no planning, no nothing-- just work. I obeyed and "laid down the work part of the work/life balance equation" time to seek a solution... it can only get better!
I talked about a couch to 5k running situation, a long time ago... and now drumroll please... I am at the point where I can run a 2k ( 1.5 miles w/o stopping).This is a huge deal for me and to me . I know what my eating plans for 2012 are.... I know my exercise goals....and tomorrow I expect a call with a salary offer from a job I have been interviewing for.
In my mind I am a runner, but physically right now I am not what a runner looks like. I plan on participating in a 5k, 2012 jingle bell run, and I might even just run up and join a stranger or two while they run their dogs if I get a notion. Stay tuned for the eating path update I have to get it down pat first. On the horizon- 12/31 my days of eating confections will come to a halt. "I don't do dessert" will be my new mantra. I will also know that there is a beginning and an end to my work day.
I am believing that everyone had a really Merry Christmas I sure did!
Toodles~

Perspective is everything!

Two more days before CHRISTmas! This is a very different Christmas for me.... It's not my first "grown up " one- but I can tell you it's most definitely the one where I have acted the most adult.
As a kid I was thinking each time I read in the word "that there is nothing new under the sun" how could that be? All this stuff I hadn't experienced,tasted,visited, bought,etc... and I'm reading all the stuff that I consider to be unexplored awesomeness is actually "old news"? for real?...
This year I understand - why my parents poured soo much into our Christmas's - it was because they'd reach where I am now... they know that folks go out spend to the hilt- for 24 hours of ooh's and ahh's and all kinds of oral gluttony... and then by the next work day get to worrying. That the good feelings (which for some reason this year folks seem more hostile and less "Christmasesque" as usual) will dissipate and reversion to the usual will ensue...
They knew that everyday should be filled with connecting with fam on a good level, and dealing w/ each other with love and civility because it's not always a death that seperates ( distance, Alzheimers, and motives and notions) can do the same. That when folks are truly "gone from the stratsophere that we know as earth" they are gone and there's no sayin, or fixin' anything at that time, or doin' the undone.
This year at this time in the year I find myself - on a self imposed hiatus from work. I have recognized that I can chase money and lose my mind. I prefer my sanity- the money will find me. I now solidily have confirmed that folks are afraid to be their true core selves. That titles and positions and letters following after a name ( I have currently "BOUGHT" 8 letters) through the guise of testing and scholarly endeavours, seem to be the personal fort used for protection... My parents taught us all long ago that who we are - is "enough" and I can honestly say they were correct on this.... ( as they are/were on sooo many things).
I have learned that my version of life is good. It's not perfect, it's not pretty, it's tight sometimes but it's my path.
From the health standpoint I have learned that I CAN DO SO MUCH more than I thought this body could. It's endured a lot over my life years. I have done a lot of not soo good things to it... and this year it's been obliging me with increased stamina... improved well being because I concentrated on it more than the proverbial 21 days ( the time frame for a habit to supposedly form) - my habit makere is broken obviously.
I have cut a lot of stuff from my diet, my life, and my thoughts... and am in the process of filling my life with meaningful things. ( a new job, new experiences ( new friends and a few refurbished ones) and an ever increasing love of God and his directives and desires for me!
Wishing everyone a Merry CHRISTmas and Happy New Year.

"Whatcha' gonna do for me"?

This is the one thing I plan on doing this weekend! That one word says it all. I want to do so many things, and it seems like I want to do them all at once. But at the top of the list is RELAX!

I don't know when I turned into this multi-tasking, get it done yesterday type person, but honestly sometimes I don't like her. I want her to leave and go on a sabbatical and come back with the next deadline.. problem is - there is always a deadline- there is always something that needs my attention. Since I have been typing THIS blog entry I have had to go back and "correct" abbreviations! What's up with that? "docutexting" is a whole "nother" world.

Not sure I remember how to relax, or how deep I want to go into relaxation. I am not a "sleep in kinda lady". I will answer the phone most of the time. With life as it is right now- turning the ringer off is not "really" a good option. What to do?

I need to keep on my increased plant eating lifestyle, so I definitely need to get some more recipes from somewhere I don't want get bored and overdosing on soy is not on my docket of things to do~ and a shrinking girl like me needs options. I don't know if curiosity killed the cat.. but I know boredom probably set in first and then curiosity reared it's head! I CAN'T have a boring menu!

I want to work in my garden - it's kinda hairy out there and the weeds will not win!

I want to read. I have several "books in waiting" the nook is a lovely thing when used properly - right now it's e-storage and not an e-reader. I can remedy that.

I will let you know what I decided on. I got to get back to assisting my laptop to doing what "lappies" do- work!(it's to my immediate right downloading new settings) ( I told you I multi- tasked) I hope I keep this promise to myself.

RtotheEtotheLtotheAtotheX!

How the heck have you been? Where the heck have you been?

Okay so I have been on the "lam" so to speak? Not really- I knew where I was and most of the time I know what I was doing. One thing I will say is this. Deciding to put up a blog -good idea.. not keeping it up- "not soo good".
For the past 2 days I have been revisiting my blog, this blog. I had no idea of the time that had elapsed since I last blogged. I did not go back and read anything but I decided that I would post a new pix and keep it moving in a positive direction.
Vlogging vs. Blogging... I think that being connected is just one of those things that is going to be. I dont mind it soo much as I mind the "way" and to whom I am connected. Most times folks just shroud and cloud.. no longer interested.
I just want dialogue- open dialogue. I vlog..but I am not totally sure what I can get out in 15min. Case in point for the past 7 days I have been doing something that is pretty cool in my world.. I feel better about doing it, but even w/ the vlogging I can't fully express how I feel but. I am getting there and I will figure it out. I guess what I am doing is revisiting an old habit(plant based eating ) but it's freaking clicking this time! The last time I was a plant based eating girl; I was dating a young man named Jamal. I was 2 yrs into my journey and he made me "mad"... instead of getting my frustration out and directing it toward the object of my "madness" I ATE a big honking cheeseburger... Got sick as dog and turned back into the biggest canivourous machine ever to walk the earth. Displaced anger has toppled many a good thing!
I figured out last week, that happened for a reason, because I was not ready, I was not committed, and I was "confused".
I think now I am ready, I am determined and the fog is lifting- and that's a start. Quinoa anyone?

Tuesday

Okay it's early Tuesday. I took Monday off - not really I just did not write. I have been having these "sinus like symptoms" and it just dawned on me what it is... can you say "detox?". I have been drinking vegetable/fruit smoothies almost every morning and this is really the most consistent I have been with them. These are almost pure veggie/ fruit ones. For sweetening I am using either 2 medigool dates or a banana! it's sweet enough. I guess at some point today I'll go to whole foods because I would like to find some dandelion greens. The ones from my yard are not to be trusted - why? I have a friend that walks the yard ( this is the one I know about) and he visits daily need I say more? I dont think I have enough veggie wash to get the "residue" off this stuff. so to whole foods I will go. Plus I tried some stuff called "calm" yesterday... shut the cramps right down, and it helped elevate my mood some. Occasional this girl stuff makes me "special" yesterday my special was in the way of "no energy"... but again that may be r/t the detox stuff too. - runny nose ( never have that) sneezing like I am getting paid by the number of consecutive sneezes ( if that's the case - Bill Gates - I am in your neighborhood to live - not cruising through!)I am going to exercise today - with my walking partner Tracy- or if she can't make it- the treadmill will be in my future... I expect to feel better each day. OOh and the candy from sunday has been put up in a double knotted sack.( theft deterrant) - it will be finding's it's way outta this house today :)
Selah~

Easy - Like Sunday Mornin' ( oh it is Sunday morning)

Hey everyone - am I on a roll or what. I decided if I am going to blog - then I need to blog. I also have another idea which just popped in my head. I may have to act on that - details at 11 ...
I am having a good day and it's yet early. I did not go to church today- but I am still a Christian. Not attending or attending church is not where the "work of salvation is wrought or maintained". It does help to fuel and power and gives perspection. I often recall 1timothy2:15 - which says it all. I ain't ashamed.
I am drinking my green smoothie. I had ordered a simple book which came in the mail yesterday unexpectedly fast.I already learned something. I need to switch my greens up! Reading is fundamental. I like to eat breakfast but not really. I can really have a good time drinking my breakfast in the form of a smoothie. I add one pkg of amazing grass to the greens and fruit and I am off and running for the day. This drink will hold you!

This week I plan on smoothie"ing" my breakfasts, souping my lunch, and eating dinner. My self dare? - amping up my exercise.

Going to plant some flowers and listen to cyber church on the laptop while I plant. Ya'll have a good day.
Selah.